Saturday, December 22, 2012

Kate’s Adoption Story - A promise fulfilled

My sweet girl Kate turns 5 this week, she is my little Christmas miracle.  As I reflect back on the story of how she came to be my daughter I can’t help but get choked up.  I can't believe it’s been 5 years since we got the phone call that her birth mother was in labor and that SHE (we didn’t know the sex of the baby) would be here soon.  We had been chosen by her birth mother and father to parent their sweet baby girl 4 months prior and it was a LONG wait.  It was a full on roller coaster ride of emotions.  Not only did we get pregnant with Ella just one month after the match (yes with the help of fertility drugs) but half way through the wait our agency was closed down.  We had to rush to figure out a plan to work with the old agency AND a new lawyer to make it happen, a HUGE feat.  It could, it SHOULD have fallen apart but it didn’t - God was faithful.

After she was born we had to wait 24hrs before her birth mother was ready for us to come up to the hospital.  You would have thought those 24hrs were longer than the 4 months we had already waited.  It was torture but we wanted to honor her wishes.  So we waited, we prayed and dreamed about the life we would have with our new daughter.  We first met her birth mother and father along with their two children (Kate was in the nursery at that time).  The FIRST thing her birth father said to me was, “We are sure about this please don’t worry, we are not changing our minds."  I was shocked those were his first words, words of comfort from a man going through one of the hardest decision of his life and he was more worried about us than himself.  This was the first clue that Kate was coming from some of the most selfless people I’ve ever met.  We got to spend a good amount of time with her family and then they called down to have Kate brought up. Her birth father, brother, and sister went down stairs and waited....

The door opened and Kate was brought in.   She was in her tiny hospital cradle, wrapped like a little burrito with a tiny hat on her sweet round head.  I couldn't  believe my eyes - she was so beautiful.  I didn’t know what to do so or how to act so I just walked over put my hand on her belly and smiled at her.  I remember thinking to myself, hello little girl, I am your mommy.  Her birth mother had little emotion before Kate was brought in but when she saw how much I loved her daughter she turned radiant - I will never forget her look, she was SO proud of what she created.  I could see her pain start to ease (even if only for a second) as she saw the love I had for Kate.

After a few minutes I asked if I could hold her and her birth mother said of course - so I did.  I scooped that sweet baby girl into my arms and I melted.  She was more than I could have ever dreamed or asked for.  She had the roundest face with a tiny crease between her big blue eyes.  My arms were full, my heart was happy and my life would never be the same.  But my heart was also heavy for the great loss that her birth mother was feeling.  However, it wouldn’t be until I gave birth to Ella a few months later that I would FULLY understand the loss that she felt that day.  I have prayed every day for the last 5 years that her birth mother would feel in her spirit that her sweet baby girl was well taken care of and loved deeply.  I prayed for comfort for her and for peace that passes all understanding.  And mostly I prayed for good to follow her family the rest of their days.  I think of them often and I think of them most when the holiday’s are upon us.  There are no words that are adequate to express my gratitude to her parents - they chose LIFE for their baby girl over death.  And they chose to give her a life they would not be able to give her but most of all, they chose us.

After our meeting with Kate we went down stairs to be with her brother and sister while her parents signed all the documents.  Her siblings were nothing but pure joy.  Two of the most well behaved and kind children I had ever met and I hoped in those moments that one day we would meet again.  After the paper work was signed her birth mother was discharged and they came down stairs to where we were.  They gathered their children and walked over to us.  Her mother gave me a hug, no words just a hug and turned to walk away.  She didn’t need to say anything - I knew.  Her father walked over to us, gave us both a hug and with tears in his eyes he said one final thing “take care of my girl.”  I nodded to him and there was nothing else to be said, no more papers to be signed and no more worry.  God had all 7 of us wrapped in his loving arms.

That was the night a true love story started.  Beauty from ashes, a life of hope and promise for one tiny girl and two new parents.....

To Kate;
XOXO my sweet baby girl, Kate Isabella.  The world is a better place with you in it.  I use to cradle you in my arms and hold you as tight as I could, there were times when I was holding you that I would cry so hard with joy that my body hurt physically hurt.  I just could NOT believe that you were mine.  The deep connection I have to you pierces every inch of my body.  Just as Christ adopted us into his family you are an every day reminder of his love and perfect will for our lives.  I will end this blog tonight how by saying what I say on each of your birthdays when I give you some love on Facebook (ha-ha) - Kate Isabella Blondell, you are dearly loved.....