Monday, July 21, 2014

Leslie, remember this feeling ok?

Why does it hurt so bad to be left out?  Am I not that fun?  Is my husband not fun?  Do we stink, I mean literally do we have BO?  Is my hair ugly? Am I too bossy?  Did we say or do something wrong?  Do we not offer enough of what you need, so we are just tossed aside?  Just trying to remember this feeling for my own ministry one day....

Leslie - don't do this, okay?

Facebook free update time, what what?  I'm still off Facebook and going strong.  I have NO idea what is going on in the day to day lives of the 400+ "friends" I had and as bad as it to say this, it's so refreshing.  When someone has something important to tell me, guess what they do? They call or email me...personally.  What a concept, truly.  And when I have big news I get to call my friends too.  Woohoo, I'm making strives to love my friends and connect with them because I choose to connect with them. I am also choosing not pretend that my life is perfect, it isn't. It's hard to have four young children, REALLY REALLY hard.  It's hard to go back to school.  It's hard to be a pastor's wife. I feel alone SO much. I don't feel any connection to the people who you would think would understand the most, they don't.  It's hard to be the Christian I claim to be.  It's hard to help run a ministry.  It's hard to let go of the control that social media has on my life.  But I have. One step at a time to freedom.  I pray I'm always free from the lies that social media tells, and I pray that God will continue to show me that he is enough.

One last thing before I go.  Brett and I purchased a piece of land today.  It's a great little lot in the historic district of Lakeland.  We are going to be build something on it and rent it out...I'll keep you posted.


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